Bigg Boss

Lot of us has enjoyed this show... its a fun show.... just those 10 - 15 people.... trapped in a small world of their own... no outside contact .... just operating on a voice command of a guy whom they can't even see...

The show actually is an Indian version of Dutch show called Big Brother, which itself is based on George Orwell's classic novel called 1984.

                                                      

1984 is a story set in a dystopian world called Oceania, which is ruled by a "Party" that employ something called as "Thought Police" to persecute individualism and independent thinking.

The people of that country are under constant surveillance of Big Brother or the government....

Government controls everything... what people do, what they eat, how they should dress... what they see.. what they read... how they behave... and ultimately... what they think!

In a way... "Big Brother" is so deeply penetrated into individual's mind that it controls what he is and how he lives his life... 

Bigg Boss is a mickey mouse version of this world.... 

Situations are created for the contestants that triggers emotions within them... 

That's why on the show you have...

Romance.....

Laughter...

fun...

anger.... 

lots of anger....

and of course.... you also have....

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Sunny Leone...

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I also wanted to experience Bigg Boss.... and hence, sometime during February, I got myself into a similar situation...

I did Vipassana...

and this was my daily schedule for 10 days...

4.00 am  - Wake Up!

4.30 - 6.30 am - Meditation

6.30 - 8.00 am - Breakfast and Daily Chores

8.00 am - 11.00 am - Meditation

11.00 am - 1.00 pm - Lunch and Rest

1.00  - 5.00 pm - Meditation

5.00 - 6.00 pm - Tea and Fruits

6.00 - 7.00 pm - Meditation

7.00 - 8.15 pm - SN Goenka’s Discourse

8.30 - 9.00 pm - Meditation

9.30 pm - Lights off!

Meditation 10.5 hours.... 2 full meals... breakfast and lunch.... and just some fruits and tea in the evening.... that too only for first timers... repeaters got only lemon water in as their evening intake... and ... 1 hour of "entertainment" by SN Goenka ji

and ye... all this without uttering a word... Arya Maun.... no speaking... no gestures... no communication by any means with anybody else...

Just like Bigg Boss contestants are given tasks that bring out their inner self (for other's entertainment)... I was also given one simple task...

Observe my breath...

as it is... no mantras... no chanting... just observe it... simple ehhh....

Why did I did this??

To feel something like this...

But by the time my first day ended.... I actually felt something like this....

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By second and third day end... I was like...

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I was in constant pain... pain in my back... my legs.. my neck... I was cursing myself for getting into this.... I was wasting 9 office leaves for this!!!

I even calculated ... these 10 days are like 0.1% of my remaining life... and I am sitting here in pain.... doing nothing...

But I continued... and that's when I realized... a simple task of observing my own breath... even for 2-3 seconds at a stretch... even after practicing this for 3 days... was the most difficult task I have ever done...

The thoughts just kept coming automatically... I bloody have no control over it...

All these years... I felt I was the one who was doing the thinking... I am the master of my mind... but there I realized... I don't have any control over what I think...

Even when I was just sitting in one place.... observing my breath... I was getting all these emotions...

I sometimes had sadness... sometimes feared for my son... had anger about my roommate at Vipassana... anxious about what's happening with my stocks portfolio... sometimes I was cracking jokes in my head about people around...

And of course... like Big Boss.... 

there was Sunny Leone as well...

                                                 

And that's where I realised... there actually is a Bigg Boss within me as well... on automatic mode... constantly telling me how I should feel about a situation... what should I say... how should I behave...

Slowly and steadily I gained focus... and as I observed more... I started to experience all these sensations all over my body... itching, pain, heat, colt, tickling sensations... vibrations... some sensations I don't even have words to describe... but I experienced them... 

What was happening??

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Time for some theory...

We constantly use our 6 senses as an input to perceive the world around us and try to make sense of it.. 

Mind being what we would call as thinking or intuition or guess or a hunch...

When they are at work, I get sensations all over my body... and because these senses work constantly, I felt sensations constantly as well… 

Why don't we feel these sensations in our day to day life??

Because of Bigg Boss.... and Bigg Boss actually is a monkey...

a kind of monkey that constantly wants our attention... it constantly wants to jump from one branch to the other... one thought to the other... 

I tell it that I want to sit and observe the breath... that's why I am here for.... but the monkey comes and tells me... 

that guy farted!! 

Ain't that funny... let's crack a joke on that... you gotta tell that to your friends... know what... lets play a game... lets count how many people fart in next 15 mins... this is post lunch session... i am sure we will have a blast... pun intended... oh man I kill myself... 

And so went my one full session... doing what it pleased the monkey...

(By the way there were 12 farts in 15 mins... as I said... post lunch session...)

... 

Anyways... coming back to theory... these senses basically act as an input from things external to us...

We then perceive or feel a situation that we are in.. The neurotic connections in our brain processes this information and help us form an understanding or make a view or opinion about our current situation…

A thought arises followed by actions by way of speech or body language… ultimately impacting how we live… 

Most of the times… these things are controlled by monkey… Imagine… a monkey controlling how how we behave… how we act with others… 

But thats true.. That’s what happens…

                               

Monkey keeps on showing us something "interesting" … or something new… or something fun… something that we should be worried about… something that we should have done this way… something that we should do… "I should have told him blah blah... and shown him his place"...

Taking us either in the past or in the future… anywhere else, but HERE… in the present moment...

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And that’s what Vipassana made me experience…. What it is like to be here… NOW… in the present moment… The sensations I felt on my body… whatever thoughts that came to my mind are ANITYA or impermanent... and their only nature is to arise and fall… And for something whose nature is to be impermanent… why to react to it? Why to take it so seriously??? Why to let it impact how I live and behave??

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A Bad News and A Good News

Bad news is that the monkey ain't going anywhere... it will always stay with you..

But the good news is that there are ways to tame it... and each one us have an ability to detach that Bigg Boss voice from our head...

All that I discussed here is only good as intellectual talk... but freeing your mind from the voice of Bigg Boss is an experiential journey...

Just like how you got you can swim or cycle ... by actually doing it...

You can only get to know your Bigg Boss... and what it is like to detach those monkey thoughts and your actions... your life... by actually experiencing it on your own...

As Sri Sri Morpheous Baba has said...

Walk through the door... it's worth it...

Thank you...